paths of discovery life coaching

 

Paths of Discovery Life Coaching

"Exploring life's possibilities"

pathsofdiscoverylifecoaching.com

pam@pathsofdiscoverylifecoaching.com

970-613-0972 ext. 2

 

Life Coaching Articles

 

 

GETTING YOUR BUSINESS AND YOUR LIFE UNSTUCK 

 

“The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide that you are not going to stay where you are.” J. Pierpont Morgan

 

Have you ever felt you were stuck in moving your business or your life forward?  Have the voices of Mr. Comparison and Miss What If ever come to wreak havoc in your thoughts?

 

Mr. Comparison says, “You know, you really do not have much experience with this.  You really could never do it as well as….  Others have much more knowledge about it.  You should wait until you gain more wisdom and experience”.

 

Our unwanted friend, Miss What If says, “What if others do not like you or your idea?  What if you pitch your idea for your business, and they ask you questions and you do not know the answers?  What if they ask for credentials?"

 

Miss What If, coupled with Mr. Comparison, are enough to stop us dead in our tracks.  We are left feeling inadequate, not prepared, unknowledgeable with no experience.

 

Where do we go from here?  How can we get loose of this deadly duo's grip and start moving forward.

 

Fear + negative thoughts + no action = Staying stuck

 

Courage + choice + positive thoughts + forward action = Getting unstuck

 

Getting rid of Comparison Thinking

“Everyone has in them something precious that is in no one else."  Martin Buber

 

  • Give yourself some credit.  Make a book, box or file that contains lists, clippings, or mementos of your accomplishments, things you feel successful about.  Take it out and review it frequently.  Keep adding to it.
  • Remember the experience you do have, not what you do not have.  Jot this down.
  • Do you know what your strengths and abilities are? If you are not sure, ask five people that know you well.

Getting rid of What If Thinking

“Every time we say, Let there be! in any form, something happens.”

Stella Terrill Mann

 

  • Remember there are costs and benefits to each situation.  What If thinking can highlight the costs, and overshadow the benefits.  Are the costs realistic, or based out of fear?  What are the benefits?

 

  • Re-frame each What If thought, into a moving forward statement.  What If they do not like my idea or me?  Re-frame into - If they do not like my idea, or me, I will not take it personally, and will keep moving forward. 

 

  • How much energy are the What Ifs draining from your life?  Notice what happens, how you feel in your mind, body and spirit when you entertain them.   

Getting Rid of feeling inadequate and unprepared

“How often – even before we began – have we declared a task “impossible”?  And how often have we constructed a picture of ourselves as being inadequate? ... A great deal depends upon the thought patterns we choose and on the persistence with which we affirm them.”  Piero Ferrucci

 

Do you:

  • Discount yourself and your great ideas?  What would happen if you kept a list of those ideas so they can be expanded upon when the time is right for you? 
  • Fear not knowing the answers?  Does this make you feel unprepared?  What questions do you need to ask, that will help you feel informed and move in the direction you wish to go next. 

 

  • Flounder about, wondering whom to contact?  Write out the names of people you would like to explore your idea with further.  What business are they in? What are their phone numbers and website addresses?  Make it a goal to contact at least one person in a period that is right for you.  If you work best under deadlines, write it on the calendar and ask a friend to keep you accountable.

 

Being aware of what our minds are telling us is a powerful tool.  We have a choice, we can choose to dwell on the fearful, destructive, negative thoughts, which keep us stuck; or make it our mission to learn to choose courageous, positive, motivational thoughts, that keep us moving forward.

 

© 2006 Pam Day

Paths of Discovery Life Coaching

 

 

Poems and other works 

 

Risk

 

She feels it in her being,

and makes the decision, take the risk.

 

The long journey

feet and back ache,

cold

blustery wind,

the path peeking through golden leaves,

diminishing with every step.

The heavy wool cloche,

A God send.

Will it be enough?

 

To find the tree,

magical,

beautiful,

mysterious,

overwhelming to ponder

the thousands of keys dangling.

Which one to choose,

will it be too late?

 

Hesitation

Fear

Failure

All lurking in her mind, in her being.

Should she go on?

 

YES

Absolutely, positively YES!

She has waited so long,

seen so many signs.

She has run the hard race,

she must not quit now.

 

What will the key open?

Secret doors?

Hidden chest?

Heirloom locket?

Precious heart?

 

She will not know till she arrives,

she does know

the Risk

the journey

the fear

is worth it!

 

--Pam Day

 

 

“There is a vitality, a life force, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique.  And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and (will) be lost.  The world will not have it.  It is not your business to determine how good it is; nor how valuable it is; nor how it compares with other expressions.  It is your business to keep it yours, clearly and directly, to keep the channel open.  You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work.  You have to keep open and aware directly to the urges that motivate you.  Keep the channel open.  No artist is pleased.  There is no satisfaction whatever at any time.  There is only a queer, divine dissatisfaction, a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than the others.”

 

--Martha Graham to Agnes DeMille